Part 2: “JOURNEYING ALONG THE RIVER OF LIFE”

It does not state in the Bible when the set of experiences listed will be, but it does state that at some time on our life journey every one of us will experience the eight themes in one way or another & will flow through the space from one theme to the next like a river that cannot be stopped. The first set of the eight themes states; “a time to be born, & a time to die.” Given the fact that we are all connected with one another at least at some level, part of the experiencing of any one of these themes includes the way we choose to be affected by the way our friends or family & people we care about experience any particular theme. In this case the theme we are addressing is: being born & dying.

I want to share with those of you reading this sermon, that on Tuesday September 23rd, my professional clergy colleague of 35 years, Jerry, passed away from his earthly life journey onto his next journey, the journey of his spiritual life. My relationship with Jerry was a very deep relationship in that we worked together over 35 years in our counseling practice as Psycho- therapist as well as serving as Pastors of multiple churches, some of the time in the capacity as Pastor & Associates Pastor & other times individually as Senior Pastors in our own churches that we were called to serve in. His passing is a major change for me & as in every experience in life, I learned a lot from going through the time in which his body was slowing dying & his Spirit was released to move onto the journey of his Spirit. He was hospitalized for 4 weeks before his body surrendered to the diseases of this earthly life. It was an extremely difficult 4 weeks to say the least.

Though I am grieving intensely right now because his physical presence is gone, I was also able to see the beauty of the love & caring flowing from his son & his daughter to their father, as well as his love & trust flowing to both of his children & there was beauty in all of that even though we all knew his body was about ready to cease to function. There were a lot of tears when I received the call that Jerry had passed during the night & he was now gone. Those words: “he is gone”, are life altering words. I was told I could come into the hospital to say good-bye briefly to Jerry if I chose to. I did decide to go back to the hospital on that day to say goodbye to my colleague. I think most of us know, that despite of the fact that we are relieved that the suffering for our loved one is over, it can be very hard to let go. There was no one in the room when I got there, simply Jerry’s body, looking profoundly peaceful & me. Initially I just stood silently by him & wondered how I could ever say goodbye to someone who had enriched my life to the degree that Jerry had touched & enriched mine? The nurse came into the room to tell me I had only 20 mins, then I had to leave, for the funeral home would be coming to take his empty body away.

For some time, I sat next to Jerry’s body holding his cold hand & talking to him, sharing all the gifts of life he had given to me & shared with me over the years we shared in service to God together: encouragement, compassion, unconditional love & respect, courage, insight & wisdom, ever growing faith, & deep gratitude for nature & God’s eternal presence in all of creation. Though I knew his soul had left his body, I felt him present in his silence, never taking my eyes off of him. As I held his hand for what I knew was the last time, I played several hymns that I knew spoke strongly to his spirit, hymns we had shared over the years. As the music played in that silent room, it felt to me as if God was right there with both Jerry & me. The one hymn he asked for if he had to ever select one at the time of his passing was entitled “Christ of the Upward Way” (you can probably find it on your phone). I played it there that day repeatedly as I sat with him & breathing or not, I think he heard it in his heart & soul. That hymn was played initially years ago when he was ordained into the ministry, then again at his retirement service celebrating his 65 years in the ministry & it will be the one I will play at his funeral service when that time comes.

As Jerry & I sat together in that room where his spirit had just left his body, I realized that there was no way I could ever say goodbye to this person who had touched my life as deeply as Jerry had touched mine, because a life like his never will end, so there is no reason to say goodbye. The body may cease to function but I knew without any doubt that his spirit would always live on in everyone & everything he shared his life with; his children, their music, their families, all of creation....etc. So, in those final moments as I released his hand, I could not do what I had come to do. I could not say goodbye. What I could do, was to say “THANK YOU” & then, overwhelmed with grief, gratitude & God’s Grace,  I left the room knowing that though his body was empty & gone, his spirit would be reflected in each one he had touched as they developed their own voice & blended it with his spirit. “From the life to the light, from the dark of the night to the dawn, He is so in my heart, he could never be gone.” As it says in the song: “On the Wings of a Dream” sung by John Denver: “Though the singer is silenced, there still is the truth of the song.”

“For everything there is season & a time for every matter under heaven. A time to be born & a time to die”. This was Jerry’s time to die. Everything in between his birth & his earthly death was his song intertwined together through the years of his earthly life like a river with a peaceful current, strong waves & erratic curves & it was beautiful. I am very sad & also very relieved that his physical suffering has ended. But mostly for the rest of my days, blending Jerry’s song with mine, gratitude will be my main feeling.  With tears streaming down my face, I took one last look, then left the room knowing in my heart the goodness of Jerry’s spirit will never be gone. “Though the singer is silent there still now & always will be the truth of his song.”  AMEN

~Posted by Rev Kathryn Bindig, MDiv. MS; Pastoral Care Minister with assistance from Rich Muscatello; Director of Business Development & Strategy