People often do ask “Why is a God who is so good allowing this bad thing to happen?”. I am certain you have heard & perhaps even said those words before while on your own journey.
Life is a journey not a guided tour. How we navigate the situations & opportunities that we encounter on our journey shapes our life. Hopefully, our own life experiences, our faith, the shared experiences of others & our own values all contribute to informing the choices we make & that shape our life. There is no question that we all experience both suffering & beauty as we live through the days we are given. I think we can all agree that some choices we are called on to make in life are easier than others. As the Pastor of these monthly writings, it is my hope that as I share some of my own recent story around the topics of illness & healing with you in this writing, that many of you will be able to relate to some of the things that I share & that they will help you to navigate your own seasons of challenge that you encounter on your own journey.
About 10 months ago I had to undergo very unexpected, emergency & life-threatening surgery. The surgery was very complicated to say the least. The good news is after 4-5 weeks in the hospital, obviously I survived for which I am very grateful. I have been in post operative condition very slowly recovering since that time. I have been healing gradually, drawing my strength from my faith, biblical readings where all truth lies, prayer, worship & support from clergy friends. To this day, it has been a slow but fairly steady recovery for which I am very grateful. However, three weeks ago, once again unexpectantly, I was diagnosed with another serious condition that now requires another serious surgery which is scheduled 2 weeks from this writing.
I am somewhat ashamed to admit that this situation has unbalanced me to some degree. At times I have given into the age-old question - the question of: “WHY”, which is the most frequently asked question of Pastors. Why did this happen? Which of course gets me nowhere on my journey, for there are no answers to that question. Do you know what I mean? At times, it all feels like this is just too much & so unfair that I or anyone else for that matter would have to go through this again after trying so hard to recover from the previous surgery & surviving. At times like this, people often do ask “Why is a God who is so good allowing this bad thing to happen?”. I am certain you have heard & perhaps even said those words before while on your own journey.
However, thankfully I am now able to proclaim that amidst my struggle over this new diagnosis, through the faithful, spiritual resources I have blessed to be taught & given, as well as through the prayers & reminders given to me through God’s blessed spiritual intercessors who have been placed in my path, my faith in our steadfast, loving God, our Creator has been renewed & re-awakened. With re-awakened faith, I have come to realize that with this new diagnosis I have allowed myself to get distracted to some degree by my earthly physical pain & fear & in so doing have been focus on the earthly question of “WHY?”, rather than on the faith awareness of “WHO” it is that is walking with me through this challenging time. Once I was reminded & realized the reality of what I really have known all along, that God our Creator is where our strength & hope lies, I have been gradually given the strength to walk with God as my focus, rather than to be distracted by the physical pain & fear as I move into & through this new challenge.
~Posted by Rev Kathryn Bindig, MDiv. MS; Pastoral Care Minister with assistance from Rich Muscatello; Director of Business Development & Strategy